Reasons why I HATE Walmart
*Warning: This is a quick-type rant blog. The F word is used so many times that I’ll just say F=Fuck and FN=Fucking and FD=Fucked. I will probably bang this out in 3 minutes flat because I’m lightning speed irritated with this ghetto magnet today.
First of all I NEVER shop here and only entered the store because my kid wanted a specific Batman cake for his b-day and this is the only bakery that made it. I had to walk through Walmart’s doors TWICE today because they FD up the order....Lord have mercy on me. They literally forgot to make it as a Batman cake as it was solid white frosting with no design and they also forgot to write his name on it. I’m FN serious.
Here’s my list of reason’s why I HATE(<-----yes I recognize that this is a strong word, which is why I’m choosing to use it in this instance) Walmart.
1.) It’s like a big dirty smelly cement box that collects all the big dirty smelly people in a 50 mile radius.
2.) You can never find anything because it’s too FN big.
3.) It STINKS. This is worth repeating: IT FN STINKS. Like a big old fart. And by the way, on trip #2 today the guy in line ahead of me did actually fart and I gagged. UGH. I can’t believe it....I almost cried.
4.) All the shit looks old and garage-sale-ish. The clothes are wrinkled, the clearance aisles are a wreck, and don’t even get me started on the meat case at the deli. Gross!
5.) The place makes Good Will look like a palace.
6.) All the processed foods, pink jello molds, blue cookies and other shit full of crappy ingredients is contributing to the obesity in America. Look around Walmart and it’s all beer guts and flabby tits down to the knees wheeling around carts full of coke and twinkies. Sad but true.
7.) I feel like I’m at an old folks home when I go there. Random people bellied up against the end of aisles and lingering around with confused looks on their faces. I feel like there should be a “call nurse” button on the end of the aisles instead of a “price check.”
8.) Is There EVER a check out lane that isn’t a mile long?!? NO. Even when you think you picked the shortest line, you didn’t. Between the illiterate cashiers and the women toting 50+ coupons (1/2 of which are not valid, and then you get to drop your jaw over the endless arguing “but it said 50 cents off, what do you mean it was only the crescent roll variety? Can you override it?”)Gah! I never reach the cashier without an angry sweat building upon my brow, that is if I don’t drop my shit, leave the store and curse myself for ever walking through the doors.....
9.) Can I get some help? With anything? You see the employees in blue shirts, they’re FN everywhere, but do you think one of them ever asks if they can help you find something? NO. Why? Because they don’t even know where the F they are or why the F they’re still employed. And who the F cares? I get my pay check anyways.
10.) Walmart epitomizes the definition of corporate greed. Nstarzone.com states: How high of a price are we willing to pay for Wal-Mart's "low-price" model? This outfit operates with an avarice, arrogance, and ambition that would make Enron blush. It hits a town or city neighborhood like a retailing neutron bomb, sucking out the economic vitality and all of the local character. And Wal-Mart's stores now have more kill- power than ever, with its SuperCenters averaging 200,000 square feet - - the size of more than four football fields under one roof! These things land splat on top of any community's sense of itself and devour local business. By slashing its retail prices way below cost when it enters a community, Wal-Mart can crush our groceries, pharmacies, hardware stores, and other retailers, then raise its prices once it has mono- poly control over the market. But, say apologists for these Big-Box megastores, at least they're creating jobs. Wrong. By crushing local businesses, this giant eliminates three decent jobs for every two Wal-Mart jobs that it "creates" and a store full of part-time, poorly paid employees hardly builds the family wealth necessary to sustain a community's middle-class living standard.
Shitty corporations like this I cannot and will not support and the next time my kid wants a b-day cake I will bake it myself or travel 50,000 miles to find the one he wants rather than walk through the stinky polluted greedy airwaves of Walmart. I hate that FN place.
Aaaaaand breeeeaaaathe. F that felt good.
Friday, February 3, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
My vagina is pretty enough thank-you :)
Spa week has turned the bikini-wax world a little cray-cray in my opinion. Cindy Barshop of Completely Bare Spa in NYC has completely lost her mind trying to “out-do” the world of bikini waxes with her new foxy/carnivale bikini ...
First came the vajazzling which was ridiculous enough, but now we are adding frilly feathers? We are left looking like a cockatoo is peeking out of our drawers. Ladies, at what point have our vaginas become an art project? Grab the feathers and glue and let’s make of a mess of our nether regions- YAY! I think not.
Bright pink boas don’t even look good around the shoulders, so how in the hell are we going to dress up our vagina’s with them and think this look is “HOT.”
The video on you tube (http://www.spaweekblog.com/2012/01/23/the-video-fur-feather-bikini-glam-by-completely-bare/) of this supposed “new feature” of dolling up your crotch is absurd to me. It leaves the woman looking like she did the dirty with tickle me Elmo only the twat isn’t giggling. And why on earth would a guy want to go down south only to discover that you have dressed up your pussy to look like a peacock? I have never met a guy who gets hard by looking at teal and purple feathers. When clothing is removed you are expected to look NAKED, I highly doubt some dude wants to rub his junk up against an array of delicately placed feathers.
The woman’s body is a piece of art all on it’s own without having to add fox fur and glue to the mix. Leave the feathers and boas for Mardi Gra honey and leave your va-jay-jay alone. It’s pretty enough.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Celebrate Jan. 21st and go get your hug on!
Did you know that January 21st is National Hug Day? I know-- neither did I! Well since it IS a recognized day since 1986 I believe, I’m going to embrace the concept and blog about it.
HUGS--whether they involve a big warm bear like embrace or a 1/2 arm around shoulder endearing type of pat, we must recognize that as human beings we need this so called “affection” in our life. Be tender, appreciate the meaningful people that compliment your world and go give them a hug! In honor of this day I have derived a list of why hugs are a necessity in life and a positive way to improve our health and well-being. Here goes~
-Full body hugs stimulate the nervous system~ Full body hugs have been shown to increase nervous system stimulation. This has even been used as a form of physical therapy.
-Hugs have been shown to lower blood pressure and reduce stress.
-Hugging someone can speak volumes when there are no words. Human contact is the closest way to reach out to someone’s heart without having to speak.
-Each time we hug, we release oxytocin. This is the bonding and caring hormone that also releases itself while the uterus contracts during labor and allows the milk to flow through the breast.
-Everyone knows that without physical contact, infants fail to thrive. There was a story I read a while back where a set of twins were born and one of them had very poor health and their system was failing. A nurse decided to place the newborns into the same crib (against hospital rules) and see if this bond would improve things. Almost instantly the ill babies heart-rate stabilized and she began to breathe on her own without oxygen. Believe in the power of human contact!
-Hugging eases tension, feels good, does not upset the environment, and they’re free!
And now a few great quotes on HUGS-
“I will not play tug o' war. I'd rather play hug o' war. Where everyone hugs instead of tugs, Where everyone giggles and rolls on the rug, Where everyone kisses, and everyone grins, and everyone cuddles, and everyone wins.” ~ Shel Silverstein
“Millions and millions of years would still not give me half enough time to describe that tiny instant of all eternity when you put your arms around me and I put my arms around you.” ~Jacques Prévert
“I love hugging. I wish I was an octopus, so I could hug ten people at a time.” ~Drew Barrymore
“A kiss without a hug is like a flower without the fragrance.” ~Proverb
“Every time I think of you, it is like getting a hug from the inside out.” ~Author Unknown
Now that I’m all warm and fuzzy inside with all this hug talk I’m kind of in the mood to hug somebodies lights out. I think I’ll go on a hugging spree and grasp everyone and everything I can get my arms around and first on that list is ME.
Be kind. Be grateful. Be affectionate. Now go hug off.
HUGS--whether they involve a big warm bear like embrace or a 1/2 arm around shoulder endearing type of pat, we must recognize that as human beings we need this so called “affection” in our life. Be tender, appreciate the meaningful people that compliment your world and go give them a hug! In honor of this day I have derived a list of why hugs are a necessity in life and a positive way to improve our health and well-being. Here goes~
-Full body hugs stimulate the nervous system~ Full body hugs have been shown to increase nervous system stimulation. This has even been used as a form of physical therapy.
-Hugs have been shown to lower blood pressure and reduce stress.
-Hugging someone can speak volumes when there are no words. Human contact is the closest way to reach out to someone’s heart without having to speak.
-Each time we hug, we release oxytocin. This is the bonding and caring hormone that also releases itself while the uterus contracts during labor and allows the milk to flow through the breast.
-Everyone knows that without physical contact, infants fail to thrive. There was a story I read a while back where a set of twins were born and one of them had very poor health and their system was failing. A nurse decided to place the newborns into the same crib (against hospital rules) and see if this bond would improve things. Almost instantly the ill babies heart-rate stabilized and she began to breathe on her own without oxygen. Believe in the power of human contact!
-Hugging eases tension, feels good, does not upset the environment, and they’re free!
And now a few great quotes on HUGS-
“I will not play tug o' war. I'd rather play hug o' war. Where everyone hugs instead of tugs, Where everyone giggles and rolls on the rug, Where everyone kisses, and everyone grins, and everyone cuddles, and everyone wins.” ~ Shel Silverstein
“Millions and millions of years would still not give me half enough time to describe that tiny instant of all eternity when you put your arms around me and I put my arms around you.” ~Jacques Prévert
“I love hugging. I wish I was an octopus, so I could hug ten people at a time.” ~Drew Barrymore
“A kiss without a hug is like a flower without the fragrance.” ~Proverb
“Every time I think of you, it is like getting a hug from the inside out.” ~Author Unknown
Now that I’m all warm and fuzzy inside with all this hug talk I’m kind of in the mood to hug somebodies lights out. I think I’ll go on a hugging spree and grasp everyone and everything I can get my arms around and first on that list is ME.
Be kind. Be grateful. Be affectionate. Now go hug off.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
10 Commandments for Reducing Stress
I came across this piece awhile ago and I think it has some great points! I had to add my little tid-bits after each one of course...
"Ten Commandments for Reducing Stress" (anonymous)
1.Thou shalt not be perfect or even try to be.
Trying to be perfect is an instant stress inducer. Perfection, while seemingly echoes “strength” I have recently realized that the need to be “perfect” is actually a sign of weakness in that you are not secure enough to own the fact that you are meant to be flawed. Trying too hard to get it right or not fail can also have harmful repercussions. It’s so much easier to do the best you can, whether or not it’s worthy of being called perfect. Accept your faults and let yourself shine true.
2. Thou shalt not try to be all things to all people.
Hello? Being someone’s everything is so 1982. If you need someone else to be your everything, than I suggest you start working on yourself a bit more. It is a necessary prerequisite to make it on your own before making it with someone else. Don't make yourself be the brick wall and on- call therapist to everybody you know. It gets tiring. People need to learn how to become their own rock and be less reliant on others.
3. Thou shalt sometimes leave things undone that ought to be done.
This is tough because I love to finish things I start, but then again I think it’s ok to not feel like you have to “do everything” that appears to seem important. Things can wait. Nobody is going to die if you leave the coffee table a little dusty for a few days or if you don’t wipe that muddy spot off the carpet that you’ve been staring at for 2 weeks. It’s ok to let some things slide in the name of laziness :)
4. Thou shalt not spread thyself too thinly.
Very good point here. Most stress develops when people over commit or tend to utter the word “yes” when they really wish to say “no.” We only have 2 arms and 2 legs (if we’re blessed that is- and appreciate it if you do), and therefore can only do so much at once. We also have only one heart and if it beats too fast or starts to knot up, well that’s just bad for the mind and soul so I’d rather slow down, schedule “me” time, and make my heart happy.
5. Thou shalt learn to say "No",
No I do not want to do the laundry. No I do not want to pay the bills. No I do not want to go to work. Haha---ok so more like: No I do not need to buy another pair of boots. No I do not really want another piece of cake. No I will not stay angry because I believe in forgiveness.
6. Thou shalt schedule time for thyself and for your supportive network.
Me me me me me- I love spending time with moi and you should too! Shopping, cooking, reading, dancing, sex, those activities are just as fun solo, trust me. Supportive network aka "girlfriends" will always have a place in my calendar. Women rule.
7. Thou shalt switch off and do nothing regularly.
As if anyone could possibly have difficulty with this. Turn the TV to bravo and gimme some food and I’m set. Let the mind numbing begin....
8. Thou shalt be boring, untidy, inelegant, and unattractive, at times.
Um, isn’t that what Sunday mornings are for? You’re lucky to get me out of the PJs. I’m never boring though, that just isn’t possible. I’m a goofy, inelegant disaster, but still fun no less. I have a kid to entertain.
9. Thou shalt not even feel guilt.
Easy peasy! I threw guilt out the window the day I graduated from catholic school. I shall never grace the floor of a confessional with my 4” pumps ever again thankyouverymuch. I live the good life and don’t try to be something I’m not. I’m ok with my minor slip ups and know that all is forgiven in my world.
10. Especially, thou shalt not be thine own worst enemy but be thine own best friend.
I honestly agree with this! I have been my own best friend since I was old enough to sing in the mirror and use the potty. Embrace the person that you are and nourish the person you wish to become. Be on your side. Trust your instincts. Love yourself on the inside out and you will never know loneliness.
"Ten Commandments for Reducing Stress" (anonymous)
1.Thou shalt not be perfect or even try to be.
Trying to be perfect is an instant stress inducer. Perfection, while seemingly echoes “strength” I have recently realized that the need to be “perfect” is actually a sign of weakness in that you are not secure enough to own the fact that you are meant to be flawed. Trying too hard to get it right or not fail can also have harmful repercussions. It’s so much easier to do the best you can, whether or not it’s worthy of being called perfect. Accept your faults and let yourself shine true.
2. Thou shalt not try to be all things to all people.
Hello? Being someone’s everything is so 1982. If you need someone else to be your everything, than I suggest you start working on yourself a bit more. It is a necessary prerequisite to make it on your own before making it with someone else. Don't make yourself be the brick wall and on- call therapist to everybody you know. It gets tiring. People need to learn how to become their own rock and be less reliant on others.
3. Thou shalt sometimes leave things undone that ought to be done.
This is tough because I love to finish things I start, but then again I think it’s ok to not feel like you have to “do everything” that appears to seem important. Things can wait. Nobody is going to die if you leave the coffee table a little dusty for a few days or if you don’t wipe that muddy spot off the carpet that you’ve been staring at for 2 weeks. It’s ok to let some things slide in the name of laziness :)
4. Thou shalt not spread thyself too thinly.
Very good point here. Most stress develops when people over commit or tend to utter the word “yes” when they really wish to say “no.” We only have 2 arms and 2 legs (if we’re blessed that is- and appreciate it if you do), and therefore can only do so much at once. We also have only one heart and if it beats too fast or starts to knot up, well that’s just bad for the mind and soul so I’d rather slow down, schedule “me” time, and make my heart happy.
5. Thou shalt learn to say "No",
No I do not want to do the laundry. No I do not want to pay the bills. No I do not want to go to work. Haha---ok so more like: No I do not need to buy another pair of boots. No I do not really want another piece of cake. No I will not stay angry because I believe in forgiveness.
6. Thou shalt schedule time for thyself and for your supportive network.
Me me me me me- I love spending time with moi and you should too! Shopping, cooking, reading, dancing, sex, those activities are just as fun solo, trust me. Supportive network aka "girlfriends" will always have a place in my calendar. Women rule.
7. Thou shalt switch off and do nothing regularly.
As if anyone could possibly have difficulty with this. Turn the TV to bravo and gimme some food and I’m set. Let the mind numbing begin....
8. Thou shalt be boring, untidy, inelegant, and unattractive, at times.
Um, isn’t that what Sunday mornings are for? You’re lucky to get me out of the PJs. I’m never boring though, that just isn’t possible. I’m a goofy, inelegant disaster, but still fun no less. I have a kid to entertain.
9. Thou shalt not even feel guilt.
Easy peasy! I threw guilt out the window the day I graduated from catholic school. I shall never grace the floor of a confessional with my 4” pumps ever again thankyouverymuch. I live the good life and don’t try to be something I’m not. I’m ok with my minor slip ups and know that all is forgiven in my world.
10. Especially, thou shalt not be thine own worst enemy but be thine own best friend.
I honestly agree with this! I have been my own best friend since I was old enough to sing in the mirror and use the potty. Embrace the person that you are and nourish the person you wish to become. Be on your side. Trust your instincts. Love yourself on the inside out and you will never know loneliness.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Resolutions: My Top Ten
Being that I am completely indecisive when it comes to picking one of anything, it would be impossible for me to choose one single resolution, therefore I’ve decided to list my top ten. This way I don’t have to drown in the pressure of succumbing to a single concept nor do I feel like a failure if I decide to suddenly kick one of them to the wind and focus more on the next. I make changes all year round in a disorganized and spontaneous fashion, so I’m not even a prime candidate for this whole resolution thing, but what the hell. It’s a new year and I have officially made it into 2012 a better person than I was in 2011, I still have all my limbs, a big healthy heart, and a happy mood that swings my soul---and while I’ll drink to that alone, there’s always room for more improvements in my life. So here goes!
1.) I am no longer going to buy shoes that I do not need simply because they’re cute and make a fashion statement. (I already know that this will be the first one to fly out the window. I will be full of excuses) I should just delete this.
2.) I will pick up my shoes rather than have them scattered in piles by every doorway. My husband will have less injuries and I will be able to better locate them if I put them away.
3.) No more ice cream unless it’s organic and dairy free. I am eating french silk ice cream as I type this and I have exactly 29 hours to finish off this gallon before 2012 hits. Geeeeeeezzzz better get one more helping.
4.) I will limit my mid-day coffee purchases to once a week. Honestly. Should a 12 oz. white mocha latte really cost $5? I think NOT. I will no longer support this.
5.) I will, without doubt, start writing a book before Spring. I must must must follow through on this.
6.) I will stop complaining about how much I despise my hair and instead feel thankful that I at least have hair. If anyone catches me complaining about it I will give them permission to chop it off. (There may be exceptions to this, but as of now this is my resolution)
7.) I will learn how to make spanikopita. I have been wanting to make this for years and damn it, 2012 is going to be the YEAR!
8.) I must. I must. I must increase my bust. If my boobie meditations don’t pan out than I’m going to pay for some. I have wanted boobs since I was 11 and am still waiting for them to grow....
9.) Go to yoga! This year I am going to do yoga. I have always wanted to and I don’t know what I’m waiting for!
10.) Love more. If I ever catch myself being critical towards myself or another person I’m going to “flip it” and instead say something positive. Life is too short for negative energy. We need to love each other more.
I am going to print this out and hang it by my mirror and really try to accomplish all these things! Then I’m going to browse the shoes on zappos and see if I can’t find a couple more pairs before 2012 hits. Clock is ticking....
1.) I am no longer going to buy shoes that I do not need simply because they’re cute and make a fashion statement. (I already know that this will be the first one to fly out the window. I will be full of excuses) I should just delete this.
2.) I will pick up my shoes rather than have them scattered in piles by every doorway. My husband will have less injuries and I will be able to better locate them if I put them away.
3.) No more ice cream unless it’s organic and dairy free. I am eating french silk ice cream as I type this and I have exactly 29 hours to finish off this gallon before 2012 hits. Geeeeeeezzzz better get one more helping.
4.) I will limit my mid-day coffee purchases to once a week. Honestly. Should a 12 oz. white mocha latte really cost $5? I think NOT. I will no longer support this.
5.) I will, without doubt, start writing a book before Spring. I must must must follow through on this.
6.) I will stop complaining about how much I despise my hair and instead feel thankful that I at least have hair. If anyone catches me complaining about it I will give them permission to chop it off. (There may be exceptions to this, but as of now this is my resolution)
7.) I will learn how to make spanikopita. I have been wanting to make this for years and damn it, 2012 is going to be the YEAR!
8.) I must. I must. I must increase my bust. If my boobie meditations don’t pan out than I’m going to pay for some. I have wanted boobs since I was 11 and am still waiting for them to grow....
9.) Go to yoga! This year I am going to do yoga. I have always wanted to and I don’t know what I’m waiting for!
10.) Love more. If I ever catch myself being critical towards myself or another person I’m going to “flip it” and instead say something positive. Life is too short for negative energy. We need to love each other more.
I am going to print this out and hang it by my mirror and really try to accomplish all these things! Then I’m going to browse the shoes on zappos and see if I can’t find a couple more pairs before 2012 hits. Clock is ticking....
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Because "One of these days" may never come....
I just came across this poem on a holistic website and felt obligated to share. You'll understand why as you read it yourself. Enjoy :)
"Think it Over" (Ron Bird)
Today we have higher buildings and wider highways
But shorter temperaments and narrower points of view.
We spend more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses, but smaller families.
We have more compromises, but less time.
We have more knowledge, but less judgement.
We have more medicines, but less health.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk much, we love only a little, and we hate too much.
We reached the Moon and came back, but
we find it troublesome to cross our own street and meet our neighbors.
We have conquered the outer space, but not our inner space.
We have higher income, but fewer morals
These are times with more liberty, but less joy.
We have much more food, but less nutrition.
These are the days, in which it takes two incomes for each home,
but divorces increase.
These are times of finer houses, but more broken homes.
THAT IS WHY I PROPOSE, THAT AS OF TODAY,
You do not keep anything for a special occasion, because
everyday that you live is a SPECIAL OCCASION.
Search for knowledge, read more, sit on your front porch
and admire the view without paying attention to your needs.
Spend more time with your family and friends,
eat your favorite foods,
visit the places you love.
Life is a chain of moments of enjoyment;
Not only about survival.
Use your crystal goblets.
Do not save your best perfume,
And use it every time you feel you want it.
Remove from your vocabulary phrases like "one of these day"
And "someday".
Let's write that letter we thought of writing "one of these days".
Let's tell our families and friends how much we love them.
Do not delay anything that adds laughter and joy to your life.
Every day, every hour and every minute is special.
And you don't know if it will be your last.
If you're too busy to take the time to send this message to
someone you love and you tell yourself you will send it "one of these days".
Just think .......... "One of these days"
"Think it Over" (Ron Bird)
Today we have higher buildings and wider highways
But shorter temperaments and narrower points of view.
We spend more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses, but smaller families.
We have more compromises, but less time.
We have more knowledge, but less judgement.
We have more medicines, but less health.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk much, we love only a little, and we hate too much.
We reached the Moon and came back, but
we find it troublesome to cross our own street and meet our neighbors.
We have conquered the outer space, but not our inner space.
We have higher income, but fewer morals
These are times with more liberty, but less joy.
We have much more food, but less nutrition.
These are the days, in which it takes two incomes for each home,
but divorces increase.
These are times of finer houses, but more broken homes.
THAT IS WHY I PROPOSE, THAT AS OF TODAY,
You do not keep anything for a special occasion, because
everyday that you live is a SPECIAL OCCASION.
Search for knowledge, read more, sit on your front porch
and admire the view without paying attention to your needs.
Spend more time with your family and friends,
eat your favorite foods,
visit the places you love.
Life is a chain of moments of enjoyment;
Not only about survival.
Use your crystal goblets.
Do not save your best perfume,
And use it every time you feel you want it.
Remove from your vocabulary phrases like "one of these day"
And "someday".
Let's write that letter we thought of writing "one of these days".
Let's tell our families and friends how much we love them.
Do not delay anything that adds laughter and joy to your life.
Every day, every hour and every minute is special.
And you don't know if it will be your last.
If you're too busy to take the time to send this message to
someone you love and you tell yourself you will send it "one of these days".
Just think .......... "One of these days"
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Daytime televison: a plethora of information.
Being a full time employee I am very rarely (or never) home on a random week day to watch television “day time” style. I had no idea how many talk shows were on, but I got sucked into a few this week and I have to admit... a lot can be learned (I’m not talking Jerry Springer garbage or the never ending paternity drama with Maury Povich- does anyone even care who the daddy is?). So anyways, thought I’d share a few things I learned during the afternoon hours:
1.) Unless you can become at peace with yourself, you can never truly forgive anyone else. You cannot give away what you yourself do not possess. ~ Dr. Phil
2.) Eating fresh figs and dried cherries helps reduce seasonal affects disorder. So does a $90 light therapy lamp that I’m considering purchasing now thanks to Dr. Oz.
3.) Simply hugging your spouse for 3 minutes can save your sexless marriage. I know, WTF right? The couple on Dr. Drew said it worked for them. Ha!
4.) Emeril Lagasse said non-stick cookware is the only way to go. Apparently if you have a non-stick pan you use 3/4 less oil when cooking. Who knew?
5.) The bones in our legs are slightly hollow and that is how blood passes through into the veins of our feet. Clogged arteries and bad health lead to clots that prevent the blood from flowing properly and if your toes swell or no hair grows on your feet your health is in jeopardy. Damn that Dr. Oz knows some crazy shit...
6.)When you live a life that has you ignoring your true gifts and talents while performing assigned or inherited roles instead, you are living as your fictional self. ~ Dr. Phil
*Proud to say I am non-fiction to the core :)
7.) Cumin is the best spice you can use in cooking according to Emeril. I have some and just sniffed it and went "aaahhhh."
8.) “You can’t wear white after labor day” is BS according to Dr. Oz! (And me) It’s an old rule that people need to throw away! Wearing yellow/white/red are proven to make people feel happier, especially in Winter.
9.) You CAN pop pimples as long as you sterilize a needle to poke it and squeeze out the pus. Ick! Dr. Oz also has a really goofy looking exercise that can tighten your saggy neck. Will not be trying that...
10.) This decadent chocolate Fix is supposed to take away a crabby mood and make you happy:
Ingredients:
6 dates
1/2 avocado
4 tbsp high quality cocoa
1-2 tsp water (optional)
Directions
Place all ingredients in a food processor and purée until smooth. Add 1-2 tsp of water if mixture is not blending.
*I think I’ll have to try this sometime just because the ingredients are so random and I love using my new food processor! Maybe I’ll try it when I’m super bitchy or PMSing to see if it actually works ;)
11.) There is an actual place for women to go called “Tantrum Camp” where they release their anger by throwing tomatoes at walls, screaming, and writing down all the things that piss them off and tossing the pieces of paper into flames. Sign me up!
12.) Jillian Michaels says that when you’re stressed out sometimes you just need to cry to release it, or laugh. (Um....no shit?)
13.) Dr. Travis Stork says that stress is our brain signaling to our body that we need adrenaline. All we have to do is quiet our mind and take some deep breaths to feel at ease again. That isn’t “breaking news” or anything, but he’s kind of cute so I listened more closely :)
14.) When your expectations for life do not match your reality know that you are the writer, director, and choreographer of your own life and you can redirect it at any moment. Take control of your own destiny! **I have grabbed the reins and am headed to Fiji! (I wish....pick me up Santa?)
15.) I learned that there are far too many commercials during daytime television and an obscene amount of prescription drug advertising. No wonder we are being called “prozac nation.”
16.) Many energy drinks contain at least double of the amount of sugar you are supposed to receive in an entire day. Long term results can be depression and weight gain. Hello?! We already know this right? Please say yes.
17.) Dr. Oz says to take short luke-warm showers instead of long hot ones because it strips away your natural protective oils and it’s better for your skin. Boohoo for me! I like me a nice scalding hot jacuzzi since I’m a freeze baby. Sorry, but I can’t give that up. I’ll just get some really really good lotion.
18.) Fermented foods are very good for your health, especially fermented soy beans. They are sold on Japanese markets and believed to slow the aging process. Pass the beans please!
19.) Richard Simmons is still alive and kickin’ and still crazy as all get up.
20.) Grilled octopus salad is beneficial to your heart and mind. Um..., I can’t see myself slicing up tentacles. I’ll stick with my tofu thank-you.
So there ya have it guys, a random mix of daytime television knowledge! Us full time employees sure do miss a lot of info during the work week!
1.) Unless you can become at peace with yourself, you can never truly forgive anyone else. You cannot give away what you yourself do not possess. ~ Dr. Phil
2.) Eating fresh figs and dried cherries helps reduce seasonal affects disorder. So does a $90 light therapy lamp that I’m considering purchasing now thanks to Dr. Oz.
3.) Simply hugging your spouse for 3 minutes can save your sexless marriage. I know, WTF right? The couple on Dr. Drew said it worked for them. Ha!
4.) Emeril Lagasse said non-stick cookware is the only way to go. Apparently if you have a non-stick pan you use 3/4 less oil when cooking. Who knew?
5.) The bones in our legs are slightly hollow and that is how blood passes through into the veins of our feet. Clogged arteries and bad health lead to clots that prevent the blood from flowing properly and if your toes swell or no hair grows on your feet your health is in jeopardy. Damn that Dr. Oz knows some crazy shit...
6.)When you live a life that has you ignoring your true gifts and talents while performing assigned or inherited roles instead, you are living as your fictional self. ~ Dr. Phil
*Proud to say I am non-fiction to the core :)
7.) Cumin is the best spice you can use in cooking according to Emeril. I have some and just sniffed it and went "aaahhhh."
8.) “You can’t wear white after labor day” is BS according to Dr. Oz! (And me) It’s an old rule that people need to throw away! Wearing yellow/white/red are proven to make people feel happier, especially in Winter.
9.) You CAN pop pimples as long as you sterilize a needle to poke it and squeeze out the pus. Ick! Dr. Oz also has a really goofy looking exercise that can tighten your saggy neck. Will not be trying that...
10.) This decadent chocolate Fix is supposed to take away a crabby mood and make you happy:
Ingredients:
6 dates
1/2 avocado
4 tbsp high quality cocoa
1-2 tsp water (optional)
Directions
Place all ingredients in a food processor and purée until smooth. Add 1-2 tsp of water if mixture is not blending.
*I think I’ll have to try this sometime just because the ingredients are so random and I love using my new food processor! Maybe I’ll try it when I’m super bitchy or PMSing to see if it actually works ;)
11.) There is an actual place for women to go called “Tantrum Camp” where they release their anger by throwing tomatoes at walls, screaming, and writing down all the things that piss them off and tossing the pieces of paper into flames. Sign me up!
12.) Jillian Michaels says that when you’re stressed out sometimes you just need to cry to release it, or laugh. (Um....no shit?)
13.) Dr. Travis Stork says that stress is our brain signaling to our body that we need adrenaline. All we have to do is quiet our mind and take some deep breaths to feel at ease again. That isn’t “breaking news” or anything, but he’s kind of cute so I listened more closely :)
14.) When your expectations for life do not match your reality know that you are the writer, director, and choreographer of your own life and you can redirect it at any moment. Take control of your own destiny! **I have grabbed the reins and am headed to Fiji! (I wish....pick me up Santa?)
15.) I learned that there are far too many commercials during daytime television and an obscene amount of prescription drug advertising. No wonder we are being called “prozac nation.”
16.) Many energy drinks contain at least double of the amount of sugar you are supposed to receive in an entire day. Long term results can be depression and weight gain. Hello?! We already know this right? Please say yes.
17.) Dr. Oz says to take short luke-warm showers instead of long hot ones because it strips away your natural protective oils and it’s better for your skin. Boohoo for me! I like me a nice scalding hot jacuzzi since I’m a freeze baby. Sorry, but I can’t give that up. I’ll just get some really really good lotion.
18.) Fermented foods are very good for your health, especially fermented soy beans. They are sold on Japanese markets and believed to slow the aging process. Pass the beans please!
19.) Richard Simmons is still alive and kickin’ and still crazy as all get up.
20.) Grilled octopus salad is beneficial to your heart and mind. Um..., I can’t see myself slicing up tentacles. I’ll stick with my tofu thank-you.
So there ya have it guys, a random mix of daytime television knowledge! Us full time employees sure do miss a lot of info during the work week!
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